Let me start this post out of complete honesty and boldness… Had this situation happened even just a year ago, I would not be handling it as well as I am right now. There really is a time for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
I remember way back several months ago when I wrote my first blog post and began sharing my story and life experiences with y’all. I was, and still am convinced that the tough times we go through in life serve a far greater purpose; not just for ourselves, but for others too. I decided that instead of keeping to myself, I wanted to share my trials and how I am working through them, so that someone else might find hope knowing that they are not alone in their own trials. Doing this has shaped me into a far more understanding human. A more patient human. It has even encouraged me to see and recognize my own value and worth because I was tired of seeing others despise themselves and wish they were someone else. I wanted to become an example, and thus began my journey of loving others and myself fiercely. I say all this before I dive into this post, to give you a better understanding of what I meant when I said there is a timing for everything.
At the age of 17 I met a young man and I fell in love. And yes, if you ask me now, I will tell you the same thing. I do still love him. We got married and the years that followed held highs and lows as any relationship would. Every relationship has a story. And what I am about to share with you is part of our story.
“Something’s got to change.” I can still hear his words in my head. And I couldn’t say that I disagreed. It wasn’t a secret that the two of us loved each other differently. We both knew that something really did have to change, because the path we were walking down together grew wider and the two of us, farther apart. So change happened in ways out of my control and not of my choosing.
I do not know what the future holds. I know what I hope for, and I know that I will continue to fight for my marriage through this change. I know that I love my husband and that I have to be strong. But I also know this, I’m going to be okay. Maybe you need to tell yourself that right now. “I’m going to be okay.”
I was scared at first. I was scared of the next few months and the next year and what I was going to have to do differently. I was genuinely scared of what I needed to do next. But thankfully, there is a timing for everything. A year ago, I would have sat in gloom, but my inner influencer and encourager started to overtake my sorrows and self-pity and I began to see this tough time in new light. I knew my value and self-worth through it all, and I was patient with the situation. And because of this, I was able to comfort and be there for a dear sweet friend of mine who is going through a very similar situation. She’s going to be okay. She doesn’t need to know the future. She doesn’t need to know everything that comes next. Right now, more than anything, she just needs to take her next step.
Life is hard. We all know that. You can be the most positive person in the world, and you could be living a great life. But the pain and the sorrows will still come your way. The good news is, you’re not alone. And the pain and the hard things you’re going through are not in vain. There is a purpose and there is a reason. You might not see that purpose now. Right now you might feel like you’re looking into a vast darkness and cannot see the rest of the staircase. And maybe that scares you. My advice to you is this: keep putting one foot in front of the other. Take it day by day and step by step. Remember, you’re not alone. I too am walking this journey with you, as are several others. This is a process, and we have to take it one step at a time.
Whatever it is you are going through, you are going to be okay. All you need to do right now is take your next step.
“Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip toe if you must, but take the step.”